role call!

Okay, I just have to know! I keep hearing people mentioning my blog, or mentioning other people mentioning my blog. I’ll be telling someone a story, and they’ll say something like, “Yeah, I read that on your website.” So I want to do a semi-official role call and hear from YOU. So, I’d like you all to leave a quick comment to this post, and give me the following info:

1. Your name
   (just the first name’s fine, or the full name if you want)
2. Your location
   (generalities, not specifics)
3. If you know me, how do you know me?
   (eg: “I first met Pete at a Furbies-Anonymous meeting…”)
4. Why you read this website?
   (eg: “It’s 10 times better than a bran-muffin!”)

For example, I had no idea 40-days Amy read this (referring to one of my friends from our 40 Days of Purpose small-groups) read this site, and it was awsome to hear from her. So, come one, come all! I don’t care if you just use this page as a link to Walrus Giggles, or if you’re just here to use the #prosapologian web-irc page. I still want you to post a comment, and let me know you’re out there!

i read the mail today, oh boy…

After years of struggling against this course of action, after looking for every excuse I could possibly manufacture, only to have them blow up in my face. After procrastinating as much as humanly possible even after I allegedly surrendered, the following letter arrived today…

Dear Mr Freckelton:

I am pleased to offer you full admission to the three-year (90-hour) Bachelor of Theology degree program at Acadia Divinity College beginning in September 2005. Acadia University is recognized for providing a leading… blah… blah… blah…

Brothers, sisters and my family abroad. Pray for me. I don’t know where this is going, but pray He’ll grant me the strength to take each step, the courage to make each step count, and the faith to trust Him with the details. I’m a 30-something ex-athiest going back to school without the slightest idea how I’ll get the money or the time. Please pray for me.

A blessed father’s day…

I’m pretty easy to buy for, provided you’re a sentimental sap. As long as it comes from the heart, and demonstrates family love, I’m happy. Price tags don’t matter to me in the least. This father’s day, however, I was dumbstruck by my gift from my wife and daughter. The case was old looking, late 50-ish and smelled faintly musty…

When I was a teenager, there was one thing I loved to do above anything else. I wrote. No, not like I write on here. This is generally nonsensical babbling, that bears a vague resemblance to the reality that is my life. No, once apon a time I wrote fiction, mostly short-stories. I didn’t just write them occasionally… I wrote all the time. My mother can tell you stories of the clackity-clack of my manual typewriter reverberating through the house, and how she always knew when I made a mistake because there would be this brief reprieve as I applied Liquid Paper.

It was always on the typewriter… even after I became a computer geek. I would type out my stories on one of my many manual typewriters (I went through about five of them from age 10 to age 18), and then re-type them into the computer afterwards. I couldn’t even use an electric. There was just something about the manual typewriter that made writing seem… I don’t know… more real. It’s as though it wasn’t simply relaying ideas, as it was molding a piece of clay. You had to work it out of you.

The biggest regret I have about my youth is that I somehow misplaced that thing, that spark, that obsession with spinning tales. It was as though somewhere along the line, my imagination blew a fuse, and I just never got around to getting it fixed. I mourn that loss immensely, because I remember the feeling… the excitement as the story took me. I wasn’t creating it, I was just reporting what I saw as it carried me where it wanted to go. At some point, I lost that. I haven’t written a word of fiction in some 13+ years, and possibly never will again.

Knowing all this about me may help you understand the meaning of the gift that was given to me this morning…

It’s in absolutely phenomenal condition. Marsha told me how she took it to Valley Stationers to see if they could make sure it works, and they gathered around it in awe. They equipped it with a new ribbon, and advised her that it didn’t even need to be cleaned. I sometimes feel my wife doesn’t know me very well. She proved me wrong. This is a gift I will cherish for years, and a reminder of the countless blessings the Lord has poured out on me through my family.

…they even gave me a bottle of Liquid Paper.

sometimes I fear, maybe…

Jesus went up on a mountainside and called to him those he wanted, and they came to him. He appointed twelve– designating them apostles–that they might be with him and that he might send them out to preach and to have authority to drive out demons. These are the twelve he appointed: Simon (to whom he gave the name Peter); James son of Zebedee and his brother John (to them he gave the name Boanerges, which means Sons of Thunder); Andrew, Philip, Bartholomew, Matthew, Thomas, James son of Alphaeus, Thaddaeus, Simon the Zealot and Judas Iscariot, who betrayed him.

(Mark 3:13-19 )

I was asked to read this portion of Scripture this morning in the service. It’s the first time I’ve ever been asked to do anything before the congregation (other than being baptized) on a Sunday morning, so I’m a little nervous. I’ve stood as a teacher in front of every single age-group in my fellowship (except the nursery – I should go play around in there sometime), but it still gives me the jibblies when I have to stand in front of so many people.

Today’s verse also makes me nervous, but not in a stage-fright sort of way. There’s a Caedmon’s Call song that I can very much relate to. The first verses always tug at my heart, because it’s as though they were reading my mind…

Sometimes I fear
Maybe I’m not chosen
You’ve hardened my heart like Pharaoh
And that would explain why
Life is so hard for me
And I am sad that Esau hated
Crying against what’s faded
Saying, “Father, please…
Is there any left for me?”

Caedmon’s Call, “Prove Me Wrong”

So too, we see in these verses that Jesus “called to him those he wanted, and they came to him.” One of the ones he wanted, and who came, was Judas. We all can relate to one or more of the apostles, because they were human beings just like us. I believe Jesus chose those he did partially because He knew that part of their ministry would be to people that we could understand and relate to. While I’ve always related to Peter (because he had a big mouth) and Paul (because of his sudden conversion), the enemy sometimes whispers to me, “You’re no Peter, and definitely not a Paul… but take heart. Perhaps you are a Judas.”

What if I am? What if I am a chosen betrayer? What if the sins that plague me should swallow me, and make me more like the enemy than Jesus? Ah, but that is the game the enemy plays. To lie, to accuse. The enemy condemns us, but it is God who justifies. The very fact that I should struggle with doubt only makes it more clear to me who I really belong to. Jesus Christ, son of God, savior. He didn’t stand at my knob-less door and knock. No… he’s not some wimpy door-to-door salesman.

Instead, He smashed my door to splinters, and walked unharmed by the poisonous smoke, and the licking flames. My house was burning to ashes, and I merrily sat in the midst of it, breath held and arms crossed, saying “I don’t need any help!” Christ didn’t care about my objections. His strong arms simply scooped me up, and He carried me out of the crumbling holocaust that was my home. And even now, as I stand beside Him, watching the flames consume the remaining structure, I still sometimes look to Him and say, “I have to go back in for a little while… I think I forgot something.”

Burn, baby, burn. Leave nothing for me to go back to. Spirit, take the desire to wallow in the hot ashes away from me. Father, let me be content to live in Your house, where Your Son has prepared a place for me. Help me to not be a vagabond, but a simple traveler on his way home.

friend?

You got a lotta nerve
To say you are my friend
When I was down
You just stood there grinning

You got a lotta nerve
To say you got a helping hand to lend
You just want to be on
The side that’s winning

You say I let you down
You know it’s not like that
If you’re so hurt
Why then don’t you show it

You say you lost your faith
But that’s not where it’s at
You had no faith to lose
And you know it

I know the reason
That you talk behind my back
I used to be among the crowd
You’re in with

Do you take me for such a fool
To think I’d make contact
With the one who tries to hide
What he don’t know to begin with

You see me on the street
You always act surprised
You say, “How are you?” “Good luck”
But you don’t mean it

When you know as well as me
You’d rather see me paralyzed
Why don’t you just come out once
And scream it

No, I do not feel that good
When I see the heartbreaks you embrace
If I was a master thief
Perhaps I’d rob them

And now I know you’re dissatisfied
With your position and your place
Don’t you understand
It’s not my problem

I wish that for just one time
You could stand inside my shoes
And just for that one moment
I could be you

Yes, I wish that for just one time
You could stand inside my shoes
You’d know what a drag it is
To see you

Bob Dylan
“Positively 4th Street”

yoked

Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever? What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols? (2 Corinthians 6:14-16a)

Been struggling a lot lately with the concept of a believer bound to an unbeliever – whether they be boyfriend/girlfriend, husband/wife, or whatever. One of my pastor’s said something a couple Sundays ago that stuck with me: “If you are that somebody else’s rock, they will not stand. You will fail them. You will let them down. Unless they have Christ, the true rock, to support them through the hard times in a relationship, that relationship can never really succeed.”

Marsha started going out with me while I was yet an unbeliever. The hardest part for her, I think, was the knowledge that she was going to have to let me go eventually. She never actually said that, but I believe she knew it. And you know what? If God hadn’t chosed to take me as He did, I would have been perfectly okay with that. It wasn’t until after that point that I actually knew what love was anyway. Was her choice of entering into a romantic relationship with an unbeliever the right one? Well, it probably wasn’t the best one. God used it, yes, but God uses everything to bring about His purposes. This idea of “whatever will be will be” is not a Christian concept. I may be a Calvinist, but that’s not even a Calvinistic concept. If we could sit back and just “let God happen” that would be very relaxing – but that’s not the way He wants it.

Anyway, I don’t have any enlightening epiphanies to share on this matter. I’ve just been pondering it, and considering the imagery of being “yoked” to someone who is not able to pull the plow. Two oxen who are forced to labour while one is lame, are both crippled.

the calvinist fanlisting

I’ve recently got on the “Fanlisting” kick, because it’s a handy way to get your new sites out there on the net, and get some links back to your site. Fanlists are a lot like webrings, but not as intrusive. I was out looking for a Calvinism fanlisting, and guess what! There isn’t one! How can that be? Calvinism is just so popular!

Well, I just couldn’t let that oversight continue, so I quickly set up the Calvinist Fanlisting where you can register your name/website as a full five-pointer, and then proudly display one of the following classy little graphics on your website…

So head over to the Calvinist Fanlisting and Join Today!

spirited away… far away…

I went to Kate-Lynn & Shelby’s final band concert of the year, and that’s always a pleasure. I love them both more than they’ll ever fully realize, and while I love having them come over and hang out in my domain, I also enjoy sharing their “natural habitat” – be that their home or school or whatever. Alyssa had a great time, and looks very forward to Evangeline Middle School next year, and getting involved in the music program there.

After the concert, even though I’d normally be thinking about getting some sleep, I decided I was awake enough to head on over to Jean-Marc’s place. Jean-Marc is considering the path that many education students before him have taken. Japan has a constant need for English teachers, and many education students will do a ‘tour of duty’ in Japan not as much for the money, as the experience. When Jean-Marc origionally told me about this, and that he wants to learn Japanese, I shared my love of anime with him, telling him that a great way to get a feel for the language is to partake of some of it’s pop-culture.

To make a long story short, I’ve created yet another anime-addict. He rented a couple of anime movies on Tuesday, and invited me over to watch one. So, last night we watch a film, which means I must now make two confessions. Firstly, if you’re an anime fan, you’re about to say “What?!” because every time I confess the following, that’s what I get. So, here goes. Until last night, I had never seen Hayao Miyazaki’s award-winning film, Spirited Away.

…

Okay, now that you have the shock out of your system, we can continue. Why hadn’t I taken the time before? Probably because of Disney, who was the North American license-holder. Call it the “mainstream-jibblies” if you want, but upon seeing the Disney label, a chill ran down my spine every time I saw the DVD staring me in the face. The same chill that I get when talking to someone about anime, and they bring up Pokemon or Dragonball as examples of the genre. (shudder) So last night I was happy with the fact that Kate n’ Berrs would no longer pick on me for not having watched this movie. Unfortunately, it’s not that simple.

This brings me to my second confession, which is going to seem even more shocking to most of my fellow anime-addicts…

I did not like the movie, Spirited Away.
(jumps into a foxhole, and trembles in the darkness)

I’m sorry guys, I didn’t. It was too surreal for me. It was just images strung together by a series of vagueries. Yes, I know it has won dozens of awards, but it just didn’t do it for me. Maybe I’m uncultured. But I really didn’t enjoy it. However, I DID enjoy spening time with Jean-Marc (and Dave, who joined us a little later), so it’s all good in the end.

one does not simply walk into mordor

[Click here to view "One does not simply walk into Mordor..."]

Like that? That’s one of the new posts over at Walrus Giggles. While you’re there, be sure to check out the Scary Guy, and these cool dudes cruising for chicks. The disappearing ball made me laugh too.

One more thing for all you budding webmasters out there. I know what you’ve been wondering. You’ve found yourself merrily coding away, and paused in mid-HTML, thinking, “If only there was somewhere for walruses to submit their sites for public consumption. Why, oh why, isn’t there a walrus webring? Your cries for justice have not fallen on deaf ears, my friends! Now you too can be a part of the walrus phenomenon, and join the Walrus Webring! Not only will you get mutliple links to your site, but you’ll be able to showcase this wonderful webring logo on your site!

This site is a member of: The Walrus Webring

So hop on the Walrus Wagon, and join today! As long as your site is clean, and you have at least one family member, however distant, with tusks (over-bites are accepted), you too can be a member of the Walrus Webring!

another week half over

Well, it’s been a pretty good week. My Kate-Lynn stayed with us all week, which is always good. Thankfully we have a God who answers prayer, and Shelby, Tieren & Ron returned safely home on Tuesday morning. Also, one of the advantages of working for an American company is that I sometimes get unexpected days off, like Monday. While everyone else in Canada was off to work as usual, I celebrated Memorial day by sleeping in.

Speaking of which, I can’t help but notice the sharp contrast between the U.S. Memorial Day, and it’s Canadian counterpart, ‘Rememberance Day’ (November 11th). All I hear about Memorial Day are parties, Star Trek movie marathons, and one-day only mega-sales. Meanwhile, in Canada, Rememberance Day is quite a sober time, surrounded by the memories of those who have fallen in wars that they never wanted to be in. Everyone wears a poppy, and even anti-war activist cool thier boots to honour the memory of those they earnestly wish had never fought. Americans… I don’t think I’ll ever really understand them.

Speaking of mega sales, Senor Cardgage is back, and is having a ‘Senorial Day Sale,’ so go check out his vera low prices! Stay away from Bubs though… he’s a total sham.

There’s also a couple of new additions over at Walrus Giggles. Don’t miss the incredible ninja action, but if that doesn’t tickle your fancy, try the BMX Park game. There’s also an important safety film about making your light saber safer.

Oh, and because Amy apparently believes that making it into one of my blog posts is something to be desired, I’m mentioning Amy’s name for no particular reason. Now Amy is a blog superstar of Amy-ness. Amy-way, I’d better get back to Amy before Amy notices I’m not Amy-ing because I’m too busy with Amy.