where oh were did my psychopath go?

Well, I haven’t heard from my favorite paranoid psychotic, Geoff Hudson, since Friday so I can only assume he managed to get a day-pass to visit his family, or stalk a professor of Hebrew or something. I talked about ol’ Geoffy in Sunday School today, and explained to those present that, while we are commanded to always be ready to give an answer for the hope that we have, there are some individuals who offer somewhat unique arguments. How does one offer a defense for an argument that one simple made up, which has no scholarly foundation, no textual support or historical representation… simply manufactured in the mind of one individual?

Imagine, if you will, that an individual walks up to you and believes that this “Jesus” was actually Socrates or Plato operating under an alias. The dating of all the Christian texts is simply wrong. How does one argue against that? When an individual demonstrates that they have no need (or desire) for evidence, but demonstrates that they have a “blind faith” that exceeds that faith exercised by Christians by about a light-year. At what point does one differentiate between “faith” and “delusion?” I feel sorry for those folks who have to exercise such faith, as it must be exhausting. To believe, proclaim, and defend, for example, that all existence came about by the random convergence of variables… that, my friends, is blind faith.

notorious tree killer

The headline alone was worth reading the article. “Notorious B.C. tree killer in court“ Having lived in Vancouver and enjoyed relaxing in Stanley Park, I probably would have been a little more uneasy had I known there was a serial killer lurking in a nearby condo. She slipped out under the cover of night with the tools of her trade: A bottle of chemicals and a cordless drill. She stalked her prey who, thankfully, couldn’t run very fast. Before anyone knew what was happening, the deed was done – another victim of an unknown crazed murderer.

Female serial killers are a rarity, so we can only assume she had some deep-seeded issues that took root and caused her to go against the grain. I’m not sure what caused her to branch out from killing dandilions, but for the sake of the people of Vancouver, I hope she finally leaves.

happy new year?

The year is 1582. The Protestant Reformation has been firmly established in various areas of Europe. Ulrich Zwingli was killed over half a century earlier, Martin Luther has been dead for 35 years, and John Calvin died 18 years ago. A problem faced the church, but it had little to do with schism over doctrine, theological reformation, or political intrigue. The problem was Easter… again. Over a thousand years earlier, the “Quartodeciman Controversy” rocked the church as the eastern and western churches debated when it was proper to celebrate Easter. Fundamentally, it was an argument over calendars. The Bible utilizes the Hebrew lunisolar calendar, but Rome used a purely solar calendar. Because the moon and sun’s rotations don’t have a directly correlating relationship, this causes some difficulties when trying to calculate a matching date. The calendar established Julius Caesar was excellent, but it was out of sync with the universally recognizes solstices and equinoxes. It wasn’t off by much – only 11 minutes per year – but by the 16th century, the celebration of Easter had lost it’s synchronization with the lunar orbit by four days.

Enter Jesuit mathematician Christopher Clavius who, fulfilling a mandate of the Council of Trent, developed a new calendar system that would bring Easter back into sync with the vernal equinox. Moreover, it would correct all the errors of the Julian system, and provide a universal system of calculating dates for the entire world. Now, one might think that the adoption of a new calendar system would be exceedingly difficult, but Clavius was able to make it relatively painless. All that the world needed to do to get things back in sync was drop 11 days from the month of October. So easy!

Pope Gregory XIII accepted the new calendar and issued his papal bull, Inter Gravissimas, adopting the new calendar and announcing that October 4th, 1582 would be followed by October 15th. Yes, once again the entire world would celebrate Easter at the right time, and all would be well in the world.

Well, things didn’t work out quite as simply as that. There was no way that Protestant regions were going to adopt a Roman Catholic calendar, especially since they had all been anathematized under the Council of Trent only some two decades prior. The Protestants continued on with their Julian calendar, while only four countries (Italy, Spain, Portugal, and Poland) actually adopted Gregory’s calendar immediately. In fact, the French mathematician François Viète took great umbrage to Clavius’ calendar, and his writing (nonsensical as they were – he was a lousy writer, constantly making up words in a vain attempt to write himself in the history books with new terminology), and the city of Frankfurt broke into riot as the people rebelled against a Roman conspiracy to rob them of eleven days.

As the years passed, various countries began to adopt the Gregorian calendar for simplicity’s sake. Imagine being a Lutheran German planning a get-together with your friends around the country – some in Catholic areas – only to have your Catholic friends show up 11 days early. Protestant Germany adopted the Gregorian calendar in 1700, Britain and its colonies (including the Americas) in 1752, except Alaska which wasn’t acquired by the U.S. until 1867. The USSR waited until 1922 to adopt the Gregorian system, and finally even the Islamic nation of Turkey adopted it in 1926.

One interesting aftermath of the calendar change is the problem of the missing 11 days. For example, pick up an encyclopedia and look up William Shakespeare. You will normally see his death listed as April 23rd, 1616. Most Shakespearian festivals, including the world renown Stratford Festival here in Canada, occur on this date, but its 11 days too early! Under the Gregorian calendar, Shakespeare died on May 3rd. Since it’s only a difference of 11 days, most historical references don’t bother with the extra calculation. Imagine the confusion by some people as the new calendar was adopted. George Washington, for example, was born on February 11th, 1732. The British Empire adopted the Gregorian calendar two decades later, and George changed his own birthday to February 22nd. I’ll bet his friends got confused about when to have the surprise birthday party.

Why all this discussion about calendars? No good reason, other than I’m not a big fan of celebrating new years, because I see January 1, 2006 as just another day. I see no good reason to stay up all night, waiting for the clock to tick midnight. Moreover, I think it’s kind of amusing that 18-year-old George Washington technically celebrated New Year before Christmas.

something fun

All this talk about me being Ken Penner’s alter ego has made me want to watch something silly for awhile. I’m somewhat addicted to this silly music video entitled “Video Killed The YTMND Star.” “YTMND” stands for “You’re The Man Now, Dog” which is a line painfully delivered by Scotsman Sean Connery in the film “Finding Forrester.” Someone decided to make an annoying website that replayed that clip over and over again, and a new genre of webpage was born. YTMND.com is dedicated to publishing these pages that, while perhaps less famous than the regrettable event that was Hamster Dance, are certainly no less annoying.

This video is comprised mainly of clips from ytmnd.com, and it’s not only funny, but clever as well…

are you really real? part II

My last post gets even better. Check out this comment exchange from Geoff Hudson’s blog. I’ve added the latest posts as well, and it turns out… I shouldn’t have bothered saying anything to this loon.

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Anonymous said…
http://www.stfx.ca/academic/religious-studies/faculty3.html

Thursday, November 17, 2005 10:29:53 AM

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Pete said…
Um, “Ken Penner” isn’t an alias. In fact, he’s my Greek professor here at Acadia Divinity College (just started this year). I don’t know what you consider “traceable” but I seriously question your research methods.

Wednesday, December 28, 2005 7:22:21 AM

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Pete said…
Further to my post, here’s Ken’s website detailing just about EVERYTHING they’ve ever done:

http://s91279732.onlinehome.us/

…including his work at McMaster.

Wednesday, December 28, 2005 7:25:35 AM

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Geoff Hudson said…
How convenient, the web site http://adc.acadiau.ca/ is under construction.

Is he a Greek, or a professor of Greek? And who are they?

Unfortunately, it seems that many scholars choose to hide behind pseudonymns when writing to certain lists.

This is what I consider traceable.
Geoff Hudson, 233 The Long Shoot, Nuneaton, Warwickshire, CV11 6JH, UK, Tel. 024 7673 7417, geoffdothudsonatntlworlddotcom. (A transparent 100%er who has walked the tightrope – The Sea of Faith by Don Cupitt)

Wednesday, December 28, 2005 9:07:39 AM

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Geoff Hudson said…
http://members.fortunecity.com/penners/Ken/index.htm

Interesting – when I try this Ken Penner web site, I get the message:
ERROR – THE PAGE YOU ARE LOOKING FOR WAS NOT FOUND.

Wednesday, December 28, 2005 9:26:29 AM

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Pete said…
Wow, I don’t know what to say. I gave you his website address, and you came up with some fortunecity address. No idea where that came from. ALL of his information is located at http://s91279732.onlinehome.us/ and it all appears just fine to me and the rest of the world. His CV includes all the information you regard as nessesary to constitute “traceable.”

He is my professor of New Testament Greek at Acadia Divinity College here in Wolfville, Nova Scotia (operating on the campus of Acadia University). The College’s website was defaced last month, and subsequently is under constuction now. Even the simplest surface-level research would make that clear, and I believe I’ve successfully documented that fact on my own blog. Interesting? Only if you’re paranoid.

While I appreciate your attempt to maintain a level of critical skepticism of scholarship claims, your work on this site has been, quite frankly, irresponsible. I hope you’ll take some time to refocus your efforts. It’s a good idea, just executed poorly.

Wednesday, December 28, 2005 9:59:09 AM

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Geoff Hudson said…
So you will have no objection to identifying yourself in the same manner, will you not, Pete?

For all I know, you might be the illusive Ken Penner yourself? In any event, I would have thought Mr Ken Penner would be writing to me complaining personally.

Strangely, the web site for the Penner family http://members.fortunecity.com/penners/ (which you say you know nothing of)has the same street address in it for Ken Penner as the web site you yourself are crowing about, namely http://s91279732.onlinehome.us Thus according to your own evidence, and by implication, the latter web site you gave me must be a complete fabrication, Pete.

And you have still not said what you meant by your subconcious giveaway ‘they’ve’ – you were obviously aware of the fake Penner family web site. Feeling tied-up in knots Pete? Whose research is looking a bit sick now, Pete?

Can you give me the result of some publicly recorded event or competition, not related to biblical studies, in which Mr Penner’s name appears in the results?

Wednesday, December 28, 2005 12:23:34 PM

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Pete said…
Wow, not only are you the worst web researcher I’ve ever encountered, but you also may be suffering from some form of clinical paranoia.

So, because the web is a transient, undulating, ever-changing medium, any 404 errors must be part of the conspiracy. As far as identifying myself, I will happily identify myself as Pete Freckelton of Port Williams, Nova Scotia, and member of New Minas Baptist Church as well as a student at Acadia Divinity College, but I’m not about to post my home phone number and street address on the internet. I have a daughter, so it’s not worth putting her at risk.

All you ever had to do was pick up the phone and CALL some of these folks. Call McMaster! Call Acadia Divinity College! Rather, you make assertions and then dismiss all evidences as “fabrications” in your manufactured conspiracy. The amount of time that would need to be spend to manufacture all the evidence I presented on my blog, including access to university computers and faculty network privledges, would simply not be worth the time and the payoff. What could one possibly gain by impersonating a biblical scholar… victory in an online debate?

Yep, I did make a type-o in that post by saying “they’ve.” If you want to think of it as a Freudian slip in your conspiracy theory, feel free. I now inderstand why Ken never bothered to respond to you (outside of the email you say you recieved). Why would any scholar in his right mind consider it a worthy endeavour to prove his own existance?

Hey, maybe I AM Ken Penner. Maybe I’m Craig Evans too! Maybe I’m Lee McDonald as well! All those names associated with Acadia Divinity College could actually be me. All those books on Amazon by these folks? Those may actually be me! Woohoo! I can hardly wait for the royalty cheques to start rolling in!

Good day sir. This is just too silly, even for the unscholarly likes of me.

Wednesday, December 28, 2005 1:54:04 PM

are you really real?

When I do research on the internet, I try to be as thorough as physically possible. Since I’ve been an internet user since before the web even existed, and an internet application developer for some years, I have a small advantage in that area. I know what tools, keywords and syntax to use to dig as deeply as possible. I know the shortcuts and back doors, as well as many of the dusty corners. There are some folks out there, however, who don’t know how to do research.

Take, for example, one Geoff Hudson (geoff.hudson@ntlworld.com). In February of 2001, a brief discussion occurred on the GMark mailing list, a discussion list promoting scholarly exchanges regarding the Gospel of Mark. One Dr. Peter M. Head made an almost passing comment in response to a message:

We know that these discussion lists are full of both fraudulent identity claims and pious wishes for continuities with the pre-computer world of the previous generation. But this makes a hermeneutic of suspicion ever more important.

Dr. Head is absolutely correct in his caution. We live in an age that anyone can have a public audience, as we’ve seen in the case of Mike Klander. People whose only educational renown can be found on old detention lists at their local high school can claim to be high and mighty scholars. Seriously, what’s to stop “John Doe” from calling himself “Dr. John Doe?” For that matter, what’s to stop him from calling himself “High Lord Emperor John Doe.” We need someone to check these claims of scholarship! We need someone to unveil the truth! We need a Hero!

Enter Geoff Hudson. Geoff (who was banned from the Internet Infidels discussion forum, probably related to his repeated unprovable assertions that Jesus didn’t exist) started a blog called BIBLIOALIASES where he posts the names of potential pseudo-scholars, and waits for feedback. For the most part, he just posts the name with no commentary, expecting people to comment on whether or not the individual is real. Geoff’s last post, however, amused me mightily. On October 18th, 2005, Geoff brings the following to our attention:

Ken Penner

Supposedly, was once a lecturer in Introduction to Biblical Hebrew at Mcmaster University in the Department of Religious Studies headed by Eileen Schuler. I sent an e-mail to someone on 03/07/05 saying that Ken Penner was an alias. On 05/07/05 Ken Penner’s name was deleted from the Introduction to Biblical Hebrew courses and the name of Boda was substituted.

An e-mail I have, supposedly from Ken Penner, states that both he and Eileen Schuler are joint owners of the list g-megillot for Dead Sea Scroll studies. http://mailman.McMaster.CA/mailman/listinfo/g-megillot

I cannot trace Ken Penner anywhere. One would think that such a so-called academic e-list would have traceable owners.

AH HA! So, this “Ken Penner” is actually an alias. Perhaps he’s not even a real person. Perhaps he’s a part of a government conspiracy attempting to undermine Christian scholarship in order to shake the “Christian right” and move toward a New World Order of religious liberalism! That explains it! That explains why this so-called “Ken Penner” gave me a C+ on my second Greek grammar quiz!

Yes, that’s right. Ken Penner is not only a real live person, but he’s also my Greek professor at Acadia Divinity College. I remember the first day I met him, one Thursday in September, as he said “Let’s pray,” and immediately broke into the Lord’s prayer… in Greek! He successfully freaked us all out. I remember that Thursday evening as well, when I Googled Ken Penner, just because that’s what I do. While Geoff seemed to be unable to trace Ken, I found his name all over the place. Geoff must use a special filter for Google… one that filters all relevant results.

Among Ken’s internet exploits you will discover that he is the author of Flash! Pro, vocabulary memorization software – perfect for you Biblical Greek/Hebrew/Aramaic students. You can find his CV (including his “supposed” work at McMaster), his papers, his reference sheets and his dissertation proposal on his home page. He’s also one of the major contributers to the Online Critical Pseudepigrapha, and he is the administrator on record of the list Geoff Hudson mentioned, g-Megillot, “Scholarly discussion of the Dead Sea Scrolls.” In fact, let’s just do some extremely surface-level research together, shall we? Let’s take the link Geoff posted (http://mailman.McMaster.CA/mailman/listinfo/g-megillot) and search the text for “Penner” just to find out how Ken Penner is involved. Hrm, the only result is a contact email at the bottom of the page. Okay, well let’s just take that email address and see where else it appears with a Google search. So, cut n’ paste “pennerkm@mcmaster.ca” into Google and… wow… 98 results. Lets see here. Many of the mentions involve his software, Flash! Pro (including his home page, and all the information on it), many posts to Biblical language mailing lists, there’s the page from when he was a TA in Religious studies at McMaster. There’s his Wisdom Liturature blog, obviously for a class he was teaching. Using that ONE peice of personal information, an email address, I managed to trace a substantial amount of this alleged person’s scholarly career.

If one digs just the tiniest bit deeper, you will find his author entry at the Journal of Biblical Studies, and preorder the “Old Testament Greek Pseudepigrapha with Morphology” from Logos Bible Software which states, “All Greek texts have been morphologically tagged and lemmatized by Ken Penner, PhD (cand.), a project director and general editor for The Online Critical Pseudepigrapha project.” You will also find his countless contributions to other scholarly discussions and projects, such as The Open Scrolls Project, B-Greek, b-hebrew among others. You will find kudos to Ken plastered all over other people’s blogs, and you’ll eventually even find Ken’s blog initiated specifically for my Greek class.

Ken Penner isn’t the first to be accused of not existing by Geoff Hudson. Horace Jeffery Hodges posted this tidbit on his blog back in June of this year:

My nonexistence has been greatly exaggerated.

Somebody thinks that I don’t exist. No, not here at the conference, where nobody is yet conflating me with the docetic Christ. Rather, it’s somebody whom I’ve never met . . . but maybe that goes without saying. If I had met him, he’d have to believe in my existence, right?

Jeffrey Gibson informs me that a certain Geoff Hudson has been emailing various scholars to alert them to the ‘fact’ that I am actually an alias for Gibson.

I won’t waste my time trying to prove Mr. Hudson wrong. But if you various scholars out there are willing to attest to my existence as the genuine Horace Jeffery Hodges attending this SBL Conference in Singapore . . . well, have at it.

While I concur with Dr. Head that it’s important to maintain a level of critical skepticism when someone claims anonymous scholarship, or cites such a vaporous source, I also would assert that one has to be careful in weighing skepticism. After my surface-level research of Ken Penner, I can only assume one of two possibilities: Geoff Hudson is either a really bad researcher or intentionally spreading falsehoods. Okay, perhaps three possibilities… he could be drunk.

bored?

Hey, if you’re sitting around with nothing to do, head on over to WalrusGiggles.com where I just posted some games. See if you can beat my high-score on “Santa Sling!”

wal-mart what?

There’s very little funnier than reading sources that are clearly biased. There’s no balance, no fairness and certainly no compromise. The only thing funnier than that is reading two seperate uber-biased sources, one from each side of an issue. Case in point: WalMartWatch.com is a website dedicated to publishing the true facts about the world’s largest retail chain. Meanwhile, WalMartFacts.com is a website dedicated to publishing the true facts about the world’s largest retail chain. Both sites publish headlines about Wal-Mart that have appeared in the local news. Let’s take a look at a few of the headlines each side has highlighted, and see if you can guess which position each site represents…

From WalMartWatch.com: “Wal-Mart admits probe over hazardous waste”
From WalMartFacts.com: “Garth Brooks socializes with shoppers at Waveland, Miss., Wal-Mart”

From WalMartWatch.com: “Kroger’s plan to neutralise the Wal-Mart threat”
From WalMartFacts.com: “Wal-Mart Deploys Solar, Wind, Sustainable Design”

From WalMartWatch.com: “Wal-Mart fires manager in alleged discrimination”
From WalMartFacts.com: “Four local organizations receive Wal-Mart grants”

From WalMartWatch.com: “Children protest outside Wal-Mart”
From WalMartFacts.com: “Health care a priority at Wal-Mart”

From WalMartWatch.com: “Wal-Mart opponents get no satisfaction”
From WalMartFacts.com: “Library receives donation [from Wal-Mart] for children’s program”

It’s a tough call, isn’t it? Ah well, see if you can guess…

yawn

I wrote my Greek exam today, and more or less tanked it. I knew I wasn’t as prepared as I would have liked, what with a sleepless night last night, but I didn’t dare put it off another day – I just didn’t want it hanging over my head anymore, especially with a Psych exam on Friday. Anyway, time to catch up on some Zs, so I’m curling up with a mini X-Files marathon. Episode 132of season 3 at the moment, “War of the Coprophages.” I love X-Files quotes, and here’s my fave from this episode:

Sheriff Frass: “Those kids are brain-dead, I can’t get anything out of them.”
Mulder: “How about some urine?”

when i’m wrong, i’m wrong

Often I’ve lamented that television is completely devoid of any and all balance, and certainly devoid of any Christian entertainment (television evangelists with their heterodoxy skirting on heresy aside). I’ve had people tap me on the shoulder and say, “What about Touched By An Angel?” Oh, you mean that piece of trite mush which offers feel-good theology and the name “Jesus” must never be uttered? That’s about as Christian as any Halmark card – tastes great but definitely less filling.

In associating with such rants, I often get overwhelmed by entire networks devoted to “cool fringe visual art,” generally dripping in liberal cheese, with a side of antitheistic fries. One such network that has been the victim of my rants here in Canada is “Showcase,” which markets itself as “sexy” and “out there.” In their own words, “Showcase is the channel that presents provocative series and the world’s best movies, uncut, every night.” Unfortunately, some of their series are so provocative that Jesus would consider them forms of adultery, while others rejoice in just about every moral decadence known to man, woman… or animal.

However, there is one program that airs on Showcase (and no other channel) at 7pm every weekday. It’s called “Doc” and it stars an individual who plagued my late teens growing up in rural Nova Scotia. Billy Ray Cyrus (yes, “Achy-Breaky” dude) stars with a collection of well known family-tv stars in a family program that chronicles the day to day lives of several people (as well as their families and friends) working in a metro medical center. Now, to be honest, I don’t like the show. It’s still too mushy and trite for my taste buds, but I don’t leave the room when Marsha and Alyssa want to watch it. Usually, I just sit here writing, or working or whatnot and overhear the program.

Despite my mild distaste for the program, I respect it. Here’s a show on television that doesn’t pull punches. It’s not a bible-lesson every week, but the lead character is a Christian, and he makes no attempt to suppress that. Jesus name, His story and issues He speaks to are so openly and unapologetically discussed, I sometimes have to look up and make sure it’s still on Showcase. In tonight’s episode a kid told his teacher, “Did you know there’s more historical evidence that Jesus lived and was crucified than there is that Caesar even existed?” This in the context of a kid who doesn’t think “under God” should be in the pledge of allegiance, and eventually discovers that the words ’separation between church and state’ appear nowhere in the US Constitution. Are you KIDDING ME?! How can they let this stuff on television? I mean, isn’t there some kind of watchdog group to prevent rampant Christian programming reaching the ears of the listening public?

That’s sarcasm, folks. While I don’t like the show myself, I gotta say, I’d recommend it to any family looking for family programming that they can use to promote social discussion in a Christian context. I hate the fact that it’s on Showcase, and we usually flip the channel during the commercials (because some of those are NOT so family friendly), but perhaps we can encourage other stations to take the show on. Anyway, that’s my $0.02. Alyssa will be pleased that I’m offering support for the show, since she loves it.

Here’s a couple links to info about the show…

Doc – Official Site

Parent’s TV

ChristianAnswers.net